“It must be fun living overseas,” is something I hear a lot whenever I’m in Malaysia. I usually just nod and smile, unsure how to respond since, to me, it’s all I’ve ever known.

It’s been almost thirty years since my parents moved to Switzerland. They came separately, met there, fell in love, got married — and not long after, I was born. I grew up in Zurich and have lived here my whole life.

As a kid, I always wondered why they didn’t just move back to Malaysia. Life would’ve been easier for them there, and everything would’ve been familiar. I wouldn’t have had to explain to people where Malaysia even is. But sometimes I oddly found peace in the fact that nobody really knew where I was from. Malays are such a minority in Switzerland and there isn’t really a stereotype to be boxed into. Of course, I still experienced racism and discrimination, but it was always based on the general “foreigner” label, not specifically on my ethnicity.

There was always this strange feeling of responsibility — having to translate and explain things to my parents or help with anything that needed a deeper understanding of the language. It was like I was the adult in some situations, even though it should’ve been the other way around. But I think that also made me more independent and gave me a push to do well. I became fluent in multiple languages and matured a lot faster than I think I would have otherwise.

Still, it was hard to feel proud of being Malay when it felt like no one around me really knew what that meant. But I always knew that it must’ve been harder for my parents.

As much as I loved and felt comfortable in Switzerland, my curiosity about Malaysia grew. Due to COVID, I wasn’t able to visit Malaysia for five years. So when I finished school and was supposed to continue my degree, I decided to take a gap year and move to Malaysia.

At first, I thought my parents would be thrilled — but they weren’t. They didn’t really understand why, after all they sacrificed to build a life in Switzerland, I’d choose to “go back.” They’d say things like, “People dream of living where we live — why would you want to go there?” But slowly, I think they started to understand. I also secretly think it made them question whether they’d ever move back themselves. After all, they’ve now lived in Switzerland longer than they ever lived in Malaysia.

Fast forward — it’s been almost a year now, and I haven’t regretted my decision once.

One of the biggest adjustments, besides the weather, has been using Malay on a daily basis. I’ve always spoken it at home with my parents, so I’d say I was pretty good — but getting used to how people actually speak here, understanding different tones and cultural nuances — that took some work. There were definitely awkward pauses, blank stares, and “wait-what-does-that-word-mean” moments. But I’ve come a long way, and it helps that everyone here is so welcoming. People treat each other like family, even if you’ve just met.

So what do I do in Malaysia besides eating all the incredible food? I teach German, English, and French at a language centre near my aunty’s place, where I’m staying. As an engineering major, I never thought I’d end up teaching. But helping people express themselves in another language brings me so much joy — especially because I’m also learning how to express myself in new ways while I’m here.

The best part, though? Definitely getting to spend time with my extended family. Cousins, aunties, uncles — people I’ve only seen once a year growing up are now part of my everyday life. That’s something I’ll never take for granted. When some of my Swiss friends came to visit, it felt like everything just clicked. I got to show them my culture in real life, and they loved it just as much as I do. The best part was watching my Swiss and Malaysian friends get along so well — like both sides of who I am were coming together. Their different cultures didn’t clash; they actually complemented me as a person.

One thing I never expected to have to get used to was my own name. I know that sounds weird, but in Europe, I’m used to being called Miss Saiful — even though Saiful is just my dad’s first name. In Malaysia, people usually refer to you by your first name, so I became “Mira Aliya” again, which is actually my full first name. It took some getting used to. Though I still catch myself giving my dad’s name on the phone or when ordering food here.

One of my favourite experiences has definitely been Ramadhan and celebrating Eid in Malaysia. It was my first time to balik kampung, which basically means going back to your family’s hometown. We visited my mum’s kampung and went from house to house meeting grandaunts and granduncles — something I never really got to experience, so it was heartwarming to be a part of that.

Of course, there are downsides. Punctuality isn’t that big of a thing here, probably due to the heavy traffic, but I’ve learned to be patient with it. I’ve also come to really appreciate the public transport system in Switzerland. In KL city, it’s actually great, but once you leave the city centre, it gets trickier. I never stepped into a bus or train here — though in Switzerland, I practically do that every day. My car usage has gone way up. Back in Zurich, I’d go days or even weeks without getting into a car. Walkability isn’t the same either — my average of 9000 steps a day decreased to 3000, which makes me feel unfit. And I miss the seasons — especially winter. The humidity here is tough on my skin and makes my eczema flare up, which hasn’t been fun. Financially, the currency difference between Swiss francs and ringgit is also something I’ve had to adjust to, but it’s made me more mindful and appreciative of the simple things.

Now the question I get a lot is, “Do you prefer living in Switzerland or Malaysia?” And honestly, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to fully answer that. I miss whichever place I’m not in.

For a long time, I thought I had to choose — pick one culture, one identity, and one home. But I’ve learned it’s okay to belong to more than one place and to carry both cultures in me.

I’ve realised how lucky I am to have two places that feel like home. But for now, I do know that my future and where I’m meant to be is in Switzerland.